Resources

When Breath Becomes Air (2017)

by Paul Kalanithi

This is one of my all-time favourite books on death and dying. Paul Kalanithi is a surgeon, a philosopher, a father, a husband, a beautiful person – and he dies.

The book documents the final years of his life, from diagnosis until death. His bravery, clarity, knowledge, compassion, and love of life shine from every page. It made me smile, and cry, and deeply miss him, without ever having met him.

I thoroughly recommend this book.

A Better Death (2019)

by Dr Ranjana Srivastava

Ranjana Srivastava draws on her extensive experience as an oncologist to share stories of her patients that teach us about dying well, and more importantly: what that means for living well.

I enjoyed the clarity her medical background brings to the conversation, merged with the love, respect, and care she is showing her patients.

This book is for anyone entering the world of oncology or palliative care as a patient but reaches beyond that into how we can live with strength, gratitude and acceptance.

The In-Between (2023)

by Hadley Vlahos, RN

Hadley Vlahos works as a palliative care nurse in the USA, and this book is part autobiography, part case study.

Each chapter follows one of her patients into death, while focusing on the deep connections Hadley Vlahos forms with her patients, as well as their their wisdom and life lessons.

Hadley Vlahos is active on social media as @nurse.hadley, and her accounts are follow-worthy.

Nothing to Fear (2024)

by Julie McFadden, RN

I have not yet read this book but I am already including it here, as I am planning to read it!

Julie McFadden is @HospiceNurseJulie on social media, and her accounts are some of the most informative for when it comes to understanding the realities and practicalities of approaching end-of-life.

They are also really positive and hopeful, hence the title of her book.

Caring for the Dying (2017)

by Henry Fersko-Weiss

Henry Fersko-Weiss created the very first end-of-life doula program in the United States at a hospice in New York City, a program which had been adapted from the birth doula movement. This book draws on his decades-long experience in the field.

It is directed both at doulas and at families and friends of those approaching end-of-life, and it explains how the “doula way” of support can form part of a more holistic care plan for the dying.

Smoke Gets in Your Eyes (2016)

by Caitlin Doughty

If you’ve ever wondered what happens behind the doors of a crematorium, then this book is for you. Caitlin Doughty is fearless, feisty and sometimes a bit on the nose – but that combination gives us the opportunity to follow along on her sometimes rather unbelievable “adventures”.

This book is not exactly inspiring, but astonishing, funny, informative, and thoroughly entertaining.

Funeral Rights (2016)

by Robert Lyrkins

“What the Australian death-care industry doesn’t want you to know”… I am not sure that’s a great title – possibly it’s good marketing? What is true is that funerals in Australia (and elsewhere) are often organised by large corporations, bringing shareholders and profit-margins into the picture.

The point is that not knowing your funeral rights will not serve you well, and will play into the pockets of those hoping to financially benefit from you.

I see this as just another reason for why we need to talk about death: If we don’t, then we won’t learn of our rights, and continue to trust in those who may not have our best interests at heart.

After the Worst Has Happened (2024)

by Richard Gosling

In this book Richard Gosling describes his midlife journey from public service into the funeral industry. His decisions was in part prompted by his young daughter’s accident and subsequent series of surgeries that caused him to face her mortality.

He imagined what it would be like to loose a beloved family member, and what it would take to support a family in crisis, and ended up serving such families with his time, care, openness, and plenty of humour – at all hours of the day and night.

A gentle, personal, and knowledgeable autobiography, providing insights into daily life at an Australian funeral home.